I know, the title of this article sounds a bit extreme. What on earth is the correlation between being a woman of color and what I accomplished in life? Well, that is what this article is all about. As some of you guys know, I am half Surinamese and half Dutch and this has had a big influence on the way my life turned out to be.
Technically, I am a half brown girl (and yes, some Surinamese people are brown because part of the Surinamese people descend from Indian people). Even though I am light skinned, I have always been one of the darkest skinned, most foreign looking people in my school. Because of this, I always felt different. I always felt like a foreigner, a stranger, even though I was born and raised in the same country as all the other people in school.
Because of this, I always felt the need to prove myself. I wanted to show people that I was just as good as others, or even better. I wanted to show them that my skin color didn’t define my intelligence or my abilities. I wanted to be able to tell those people that I went to the gymnasium (highest level of high school in the Netherlands). I wanted them to know that I go to a university, and that I am a law student. I wanted to let those people know that I am successful in life, probably even more successful than them. I wanted them to think ‘hey, she is one of us’.
Now I know that there isn’t a lot of discrimination in the Netherlands, compared to some other countries. However, I had my fair share of different treatment. I remember being followed in stores by shopkeepers because they assumed that I was going to steal something. I remember that some boys didn’t allow me to swim in a pool outside because I looked foreign (btw, I did teach those boys a lesson by staying there and talking to them until they were convinced that I am just like them #girlpower).
I knew people saw me as different and I am pretty sure that sometimes, I was treated differently. This negative aspect of being a woman of color turned out to be something positive. Instead of giving in on those negative views, I felt like I had to prove that someone like me can actually be successful in life. I wanted status, prestige, power. And that is what I went after. I work really hard for a lot of reasons but this is one of them. I know a lot of you always ask me why I work so hard or what motivates me and this is one of the reasons I want to be successful and why I am power hungry.
This story is really personal to me and I understand that not everyone that is going to read this is going to understand this thought process. Then why am I sharing this? I remember feeling like I was the only one who got through this. I didn’t know a lot of other people of color, and we certainly didn’t talk about stuff like this. Then one day, I went to the orthopedist and had to wait in the waiting area. I grabbed a magazine and found an article written by a Turkish woman who had the same experiences as me. She also felt that people didn’t take her seriously, and that she had to work hard in order for people to see her value. I recognized myself in that story and I didn’t feel so alone anymore. If only one person sees themselves in this article and starts to feel less alone in their journey, my mission is complete.
This article is dedicated to all the people who feel like they have to work twice as hard for half the outcome. I am 20 now, I have a gymnasium diploma, I am in third year of my bachelor in law, and on top of that, I have my own company. I’d say I’ve done great so far and I am not even done yet. Great things are waiting for me because I turned being a woman of color into something powerful.
This is so powerful (my english is very bad so I’m sorry for whatever mistakes). I’m a woman of color too and I understood exactly what you said. You ever motivate me and I thank you for it. I love your texts and your videos so, please, don’t stop with them. I’m from Brazil, anyway. Thanks again!
Hi dear, thank you so much for your comment! I am glad my article was relatable to you. Have a lovely day xxx
Hey,
Wauw echt een mooi artikel!
En ik kan me er echt in vinden, ik ben zelf Marrokaans/Nederlands en daarnaast heb ik dyslectie. Volgens mijn basisschool was een havo/vwo brugklas te hoog gegrepen dus mocht ik me er eigenlijk niet voor aan melden, ik wilde het zo graag dat mijn ouders er alsnog voor hebben gekozen om me voor mijn ‘droom’ school in te schrijven. Ik ben uiteindelijk door gestroomt naar de havo en ik ben vorig jaar cum laude geslaagd en doe nu 5vwo?. Ik heb ook echt zeker het gevoel dat ik extra hard moet werken om mensen te laten zien wat ik waard ben en hahah mijn motivatie is vooral om later te kunnen laten zien dat ik het wel kan? ik vind je artikelen echt GEWELDIG❤️
Xx Amal
Hi Amal, dankjewel voor je lieve reactie. Snap jouw point of view heel goed! Ik heb het zelf ook. Succes met het vwo xxx
please don’t even write an article on how being a ‘women of colour’ has helped you. You aren’t a women of colour physically. You know nothing about what people of colour go through so please, as a white coloured person, don’t attempt to talk anything about it because it really pisses us coloured people off. you have white privellege- regardless of whether you have a hint of brown in you, your skin is white. full stop. you have privellges that people of colour don’t. so as i said before, please delete this article because you have no right to talk about how being a coloured person has helped you- even if you are ‘slightly darker’ than the rest of the people in your school – your skin is still white.
Oh honey, look at the attached pictures a little closer. I am not white, not even close. I don’t have the privileges a white person has because I am a person of color. Not only my skin color but also the features in my face and body are obviously not white. Even though I don’t have a very dark skin, my skin is dark enough to be treated different than others so my experiences are valid. I am a person of color by definition and I am not going to let someone that hasn’t seen more than my arms on a picture on the internet tell me that I am not. Good day.
How do you know that she has white privilege? And who are you to judge how dark her skin has to be for her to be a woman of color.
That just doesn’t make any sense.
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. Please don’t be so ignorant. You don’t have to have BLACK skin to be discriminated. Native Americans and Latinos have light dark skin, and they face discrimination too. I know that African Americans have been through a lot of social injustice and unfortunately racism is still perpetuating. But, you are very wrong to speak so ill of her. (ways to study)
This article is so beautiful. My favourite so far! I’m not a person of colour but I can relate with this article a little bit because my coleagues think I’m really weird and stupid and so they don’t take me seriously. I try everyday at school to prove them that I can be smart and a person who you can ask questions without checking the book. I know that one day I’ll get the reward I deserve because I’m working really hard, increasing my willpower and most important… I have waystostudy to remember me that everything is possible if I have the determination. Ly.
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with me, dear! Stay strong and good luck xx
Thank you so much for this. ❤
♥️
Omg im a woman of color myself. And this inspired me so mutch thaaanks, stay strong
Thanks, love. You too! xx
Ik vind dit echt een heel mooi artikel! Ik moet eerlijk zeggen dat ik het lastig vind om te lezen hoe andere mensen zich gedragen op basis van jouw huidskleur. Uiteindelijk heeft het je sterker gemaakt, maar het is zo onbegrijpelijk dat sommige mensen niet verder kijken dan de kleur van je huid. Ik vind de manier waarop je hiermee om bent gegaan echt inspirerend!
Echt supererg bedankt! En ook bedankt dat je het voor me opnam bij die ene reactie. Helaas is het beoordelen op basis van huidskleur nog iets dat iedere dag aan de orde is. Het enige wat ik kan doen is er niet aan toegeven en echt alles geven om die mensen die beoordelen op mijn huidskleur versteld te laten staan, haha! xxx
Hi ! Your article was great and I really can relate to your story a lot ! I am from arab descente and even though I was born and raised in France I felt like I was seen / treated differently ! I was surrounded by people who told me that arab people where not meant to succeed and that they were just lazy people… so I also felt the nees to prove myself. I was always first in middle and high school. I enventually graduated from high school with the highest score and got accepted into the best univerities. I started a law degree and completed my first year successfuly !!! Don’t let the haters / muggles let you down 😉
Hi there, thank you for sharing your story with me. I am so happy for you that you get such high scores! I wish you all the best with law school, you can do it! xxx
Ah! I’m 20 as well! I can relate! I’m in a paralegal program and there are only girls my age or older all Caucasian (my bff is Caucasian) I have nothing against anyone or any race. Yet, I’ve felt so isolated in this program and have always worked twice as hard just so I can prove myself that I am able to be like them, or better. I’m so glad your 20, and your reaching for the stars!!! ??❤️Thank you so much for this article it has truly inspired me to be more, and to work hard for whatever it is that our hearts desire!
Thank you so much, love. I am glad you could relate to it! I wish you the best with your paralegal program! You’re working hard so it’s gotta be great!! xx
Woman of color? Pshh, that’s a joke. As a woman of color, I find this article very insulting. Try growing up in America as an afro-latina…
Yes, I am a woman of color. I don’t get why you think the article is insulting. As stated in the article, I know racism and discrimination in the Netherlands isn’t as bad as other parts in the world but just because my experiences are less horrific than yours, doesn’t mean that mine are invalid. I too suffer from a system in our society that is against us. I too will get less invitations for job interviews because of my skin color. I too get comments from strangers just because my skin isn’t white and I have non-white facial features. We, women of color, need to stick together, not tear each other apart for not having it hard enough.
Thank you so much for such a beautiful and powerful article. I too am a woman of color (both my parents are from Taiwan,) but I was born and raised in the United States. I am American, but I’ve always felt like I have never been fully accepted as an American, and I will always be treated as if I were “foreign.” I can also completely relate with wanting to prove myself to others. I constantly feel some people think I can’t speak English or, after hearing me, are surprised that I don’t have an accent. Because of that, I think I’ve also tried to push myself especially hard in English and writing (I scored in the 99th percentile on my SATs.) Well, lately I have been feeling down because I’m worried about college acceptances, but reading this article really lifted my spirits, so thank you!!!
Thank you so much for your comment! I too feel like strangers don’t expect me to talk Dutch without an accent. It really made me insecure. I wish you all the best with your college acceptances. I hope you get into the college of your choice xx
I have been following your channel for over a year and it has really helped me in getting organized. Being an Indian who wants to pursue his bachelor’s degree in the UK this article has really inspired me. It talks about a lot of the issues which I am anxious about but talks about being positive and career-oriented. Thanks a ton.
Love and Regards
Thank you for your sweet comment! I wish you all the best with law school, you can do it! Love, Rose xx
I live in a country where race is everything. I know what you mean
But in psycology , prejudices is explained as though it helps a person to know how to behave among something that is new to them.
So you obviously can’t exist without have ones on others, but you know what? When i feel like i have a prejudice about someone i love being wrong?
Yes, I understand what you mean. But there is a difference between prejudices and racism. Prejudices can be good and obviously have a function but thinking someone is not intelligent or thinking someone is going to a store to steal something is a whole other level. Hope this makes sense to you somehow. I find it quite difficult to talk about, it’s a hard topic haha xx
I love this so, so much! Since the beginning I have adored your acc but this has to be my favorite article! PLEASE do more articles like this! You have an amazing talent and reading this made me even more sure that you deserve every bit of your success! I wish you love and happiness ? keep doing what you love.
Josephine xoxo
Thank you so much, Josephine ♥️ xx
I am Indian and I live in the United States. I can understand what you went through because in general people always looked down towards colored people. But I am proud of you for staying strong and showing a good example and also helping others to keep their heads high. Good Luck and you will be a great lawyer!!
Love, ST
Hi ST, thank you for your kind comment! Wish you all the best xx
Wow! This blog looks exactly like my old one!
It’s on a totally different subject but it has pretty much the same
layout and design. Superb choice of colors!
Thanks!
Which article was that (the one written by a Turkish woman)?
Unfortunately I don’t remember. It was written in Dutch and probably published by the magazine Linda but other than that I don’t know 🙁
Hello! Your article resonated with me. I recognize myself in “Because of this, I always felt the need to prove myself. I wanted to show people that I was just as good as others”. In my case it has nothing to do with skin colour. I am white and was raised in a white country, but I was looked down because of the economic status of my family and the clothes we were wearing and a few other things. It tinted my whole social experience as a child. Like you, it drove me to excel at school and university. I am a bit older than you. Now I have an excellent career and earn very good money. But I still feel like I have to prove myself and it is getting ridiculous. Now I need to learn how to enjoy my successes. Challenging myself is good, putting myself under frequent stress to prove myself and because i lack confidence (when frankly no one cares and it is all in my head now) is not good. So my advice to you is to keep the balance. Use these feelings to drive you forward, but make sure they don’t get to define you.
Thanks for the advice and thanks for sharing your story with me. Good luck with your career and I hope you find a way to enjoy your successes!
Hi, I am from Nepal. I really liked your article 🙂 Keep writing and spreading love <3
Thank you so much xx
As a visible minority in Canada, I can relate!
Also, I find it impressive that you built up your instagram without showing your face! A difficult feat as I feel like most popular instagram accounts are run by model-like people posting selfies of their ‘perfect’ faces.
Thanks, Linni!
I can also relate to this because, I live here in the Philippines which is our own color is “light-brown” skin or we call it “morena”. I am a Muslim and I am Morena. It is so sad they my countrymen look to me like I am a different among them. When they see someone wearing hijab or scarf, they look upon to us as if we are different.. but thank you for this! This inspired me a lot!
Thanks for sharing your story, love! Have a great day xx
This is so relatable and empowering. I too faced similar situation. I was a very good student in my school time. But now in post-graduation I’m not the first in class. My friends who are better than me always tend to ignore me because they have better people to talk to and work with for projects.That’s when I decided I want to gain power. The Power of Knowledge. From several weeks now I have been working hard because all I can think of is “Knowledge is Power”. Rose, thank you for this article. Your work has always inspired me and now your life does too.❤
Thank you so much! I wish you all the best with your plans and I hope you reach your goals! xx
I know this is late, but I only just discovered this awesome website! I really like this post – I am mixed raced myself, so I can relate to what you’re saying. I think that’s the mentality you have to have to succeed. We’ll all be outsiders to something at some point, it’s how you respond to that which defines your success!
Namaste fellow indian. Strive on! This article was really inspiring… Thank You!
Hello! This article is amazing and even if i don’t know you personally i feel proud that in our world there are people just like you that have the strength to stand against other people who blame you for being different ( in my opinion it’s a blessing to be different). So congratulations and i hope all of us can gain a message from your experience <3 I will also wanted to ask you where did you buy your daily planner we can see in the picture.
Respect to website author , some wonderful entropy.
Lovely and most inspiring article.thankyou for writing this,it boosted my power to face the world. Last but not least,isay that”Don’t think about people wt they think about you “…
LOTS OF LOVE. …WAYS TO STUDY. .
Hi girl, I can really relate myself to this story. I’m African (typically woman of color), and on top of that, I wasn’t born in Belgium neither was I raised there. But I arrived in this country, learned french, enrolled in highest level in high school (what they call “générale” mainly in sciences), I really worked hard and proved to them that I have the same intelligence or even better, and I always scored high grades in science subjects.Finally I got my high school diploma ( what they call le diplome ou CESS). I did face difficulties like any other colored person has faced. But that alone, makes you to work even harder and be recognizable in school. Now I’m going to start my paramedics programme this year.It’s all about who you are not what people think you are. Love xoxo.
That sure is one pretty site you have there. Can I ask you a very simple question? What kind of fertilizer do you use to make it grow so wonderfully?
Thank you so much for this beautiful article! I am also a woman of colour (from Canada) I too am attending university finishing my degree and I want to thank you so much for your amazing article sharing your experience! It is wonderful that you have created this space for someone to read this and think “Woah I’m not the only one”. It is sad to see some of the other comments here and my heart aches to see hate from other people of colour! But I just want to thank you because some days I feel like I have no hope and that people do not take me seriously being an intern in the finance industry I feel like because of my skin colour I have to work twice as hard to really show I am smart and capable.
Your article has truly inspired me and given me hope.
So thank you <3
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